My Parents are coming around…
We’ve had a few more email correspondences… they ended up watching the video, which helped ease their fears, and they admitted that their initial knee-jerk fears and anxieties had made the reception of my disclosure worse. They have seemed to gain some clarity on my dilemma… in particular the awareness that what I’m going through represents a lot of triumph over suffering, yet is still painful and hard. My mom sent me a very thoughtful and heartfelt email today, and reassured me that they love me very much.
They’re not cancelling their trip! Yay. They are delaying it for a few days, I assume because they have had a rough week on account of this. But I’m so glad that I didn’t ruin their upcoming trip, at least not entirely. They are visiting my older brother and his family as well as one of my dad’s college friends who lives in Malibu… then they’ll spend a day near where I’m at, and I think we’re going to at least get to eat dinner together.
Ahhh, I feel so relieved. I’m really glad I stood up for myself in those initial emails responding to their first reaction. I wasn’t mean, but I was righteous, and I think it really earned me some respect.
My whole body just relaxed a little today, and I realized what a small, repetitive mental and physical space I’d been over the last few days.
Such is grief. This is why there are mantras.
Thank you to anyone who has prayed for me and my parents, or the secular, atheist equivalent. ;)